When you think about divorce, you may conjure images of aggressive arguments in court before a judge, full of “gotcha” moments and tension. While there’s a real possibility that your marriage dissolution will play out in court, there are other options. This includes divorce mediation, which if successful could reduce the amount of conflict that you have to face while still securing fair and favorable resolution. It’s a viable option for many people. That’s why a fair number of divorces end up settling through mediation without having to be litigated.
Through the mediation process, you, your lawyer, and your spouse and their lawyer, meet together with a neutral third-party individual who will help frame the issues and spur conversation to help the parties reach a mutually acceptable resolution. Although this means sitting down at the negotiating table with your spouse, don’t be too daunted by the possibility of having sit across from them. In many instances, the parties are split off into breakout rooms with the mediator going back and forth to facilitate the discussion. Again, this reduces conflict and can lead to better outcomes.
How can you prepare for divorce mediation?
Mediation isn’t always successful, but if you adequately prepare for it, you may better position yourself to secure an outcome that works for you. With that in mind, here are a few steps you should take in preparation for your divorce mediation:
- Get organized: There may be several legal issues that come up during your divorce negotiations, and you’ll be better prepared to address them if you have relevant documentation at hand in an organized fashion. For example, when it comes to property division, you won’t know which assets are in play and what you should argue for unless you understand which assets fall into the marital estate. Bank and retirement account statements can therefore be crucial to framing your legal positioning.
- Identify your goals: You can’t walk into divorce negotiations without a plan. If you do, then you’ll aimlessly meander through the process to your spouse’s advantage. Instead, you need to step into the process with clearly defined goals so that you know what to push for and where you may be able to give a little to further your overall strategy.
- Get in the right state of mind: You’ve probably experienced a fair amount of emotional and psychological pain because of your marriage’s deterioration. You might then see the divorce process as an opportunity to get back at your spouse. But you shouldn’t view the mediation process as a chance to attack. While you may need to raise some issues to make a point, this should be done in furtherance of negotiation discussions while keeping your ultimate goals in mind.
- Focus on your children: If child custody is going to come into play, then you need to have arguments ready to explain why your proposed custody arrangement is in your children’s best interests. Again, you don’t want to lob personal attacks at your spouse, but you may need to point out parental shortcomings that justify why you’re seeking the custody arrangement that you’ve put on the table.
Maximize your chances of securing a favorable resolution to your divorce
There’s a lot to work through when getting divorced. It can take an emotional and psychological toll on you, which may drive you to try to resolve the matter more quickly. While that’s understandable, you can’t rush through the process so much that it harms your positioning and the next chapter of your life. So, instead of moving through the steps of your divorce as quickly as possible, take the time needed to fully advocate for your interests as effectively as possible. Hopefully then you can move onto the next stage of your life with the stability that you need and deserve.